She came home

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She came home three weeks ago, skipping down the hall like she does. “Eyes closed, hands out,” she said. “I’ve got a surprise for you!” The second I closed them, I heard a thud. I’m yet to open my eyes – I’d hate to ruin the surprise – but when I do, I think I’m going to give the flat a clean. It stinks.

© Carl Burkitt 2017

Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers – A 15-Year-Too-Late Review

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Yesterday, Saturday 20th May 2017, I watched Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers for the first time ever – 15 years after it was released.

Here’s what I thought…

  • Gollum has cracking cheek bones
  • Man flesh stinks
  • How is the marshland water on fire?
  • Sam looks an awful lot like a guy I used to work with
  • They’re taking the Hobbits to Isengard
  • Shadowfax is FIT
  • Gandolf the White can’t half whistle
  • Aragorn is 87?
  • Agent Smith just doesn’t understand love
  • This must’ve been very expensive to make
  • When does Legolas replenish his arrows?
  • The trees looks like the Cheesestring mascot
  • Frodo and Sam haven’t kissed yet

© Carl Burkitt 2017