I imagined growing up
and having a black beard,
the kind uncles grow
to catch Sunday roast gravy.
My black beard was going to be thick,
thick enough to hide all my skin,
and I would have combed it
with a thin wooden brush.
I would’ve fiddled with my black beard
whenever I was nervous,
it would’ve tickled my collar at funerals,
I would never have known
how to keep it soft.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

I’m reaching for your wellies
and dinosaur waterproof trousers
to stuff in your backpack like
it’s the most normal thing in the world.
You have skin and a liver and a yellow cap.
You eat cereal and play with trains
and breathe oxygen and allow it into your heart.
I’m reaching for your wellies
and dinosaur waterproof trousers
and I will be the one who has to
stop you drowning in puddles like
it’s the most normal thing in the world.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

She’s wearing a flannel shirt
the size of a blanket you would sit on at a picnic
with five mates, gossiping over pitted olives and hummus
with crisps made out of lentils or chickpeas.
She’s chatted to everyone who has walked into
this pub, asked them about their weekends,
invited them to tackle two down on her crossword.
She’s drinking a glass of sparkling wine
she’s calling her bubbles while scrolling
on her phone until the door opens.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

You’re watching me juggle three juggling balls
with eyes the size of a set of hospital scrubs
from three Augusts ago. Magic, you say
ignoring the 45 other wards you’ve learned today
and the fact your tastebuds now like radishes.
There’s a checked shirt in your cupboard
that you wanted from the charity shop
to dress like me and I’m catching each of these
juggling balls like tears on a cheekbone.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

Romeo and Juliet
are eating donuts in central London.
They each have a wireless headphone in one ear
and their trainers are whiter than icing sugar.
It’s raining but their hoods don’t care.
Juliet’s puffer jacket is
thicker than a stab proof vest
and Romeo’s lips are jam and stubble.
They’re not talking with their mouths full
and I can hear their hearts inventing language.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

I miss poems with exclamation marks!
The extravagant kind that tell people
Oh, how the world is alive! and
Your face lives beneath my eyelids!
We’re driving down the motorway!
There has been no delays! It’s dark!
We’re catching up about our last few days
apart and the lampposts down the central
reservation are candles for our feast!

© Carl Burkitt 2023

The blossom’s out.
It’s sitting on trees the way it does
in poems that understand cycles and pink and blossom.
A man in red trousers is riding
his foldable bike at 8.30am one-handed
with six bits of 2×4 over his shoulder
and a Yorkshire Terrier is trotting
past a bakery’s open door like lyrics in song
that understand the moments
of a creature’s day. The grown ups are sitting
around a conference table. The colour of
untouched fruit is in front of them and their
smart casual tops as they desperately
discuss steps to wellbeing.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

When you go to the toilet
you need to lift the door handle up to lock it.
There’s no hot water in the bathroom sink
so got to the kitchen to wash your face.
Avoid that floorboard.
The numbers on the radiator in the spare room
are the wrong way round.
Do not use the light switch on the landing.
Ignore the ghost that looks like every single
mistake I have made while I’ve been awake.
There’s milk in the fridge.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

The mornings begin
with birds or tea or in-jokes
between two people who made a promise.
The mornings begin
with a squint and a thumbnail-sized sun
sitting above a house stuffed with friends
made from ancient glitter and fuzziness.
The mornings begin.
The mornings begin
with curtains unsure how heavy they’ll be today.
The mornings begin
with a leafless tree. Dust. A toddler walks in.
The mornings begin.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

My health
couldn’t be bothered to come in today.
It made excuses about traffic and needing
to get its son to childcare and not being
able to find any breakfast and sweating
through every item of clothing it owns
during the death of the night
and I want to listen, to understand, to give it
space let it do what it needs and trust, hope,
it remembers all I have given it.

© Carl Burkitt 2023