John was not a fan of summer.
He had no skin, you see,
So the sun cream
Played havoc with his innards.

© Carl Burkitt 2016

Phil was double hard.

He squeezed his post-gym frame
into the greasy spoon’s snug booth

And ran his finger around a
small pot of hot sauce

As he finally opened up to Paul
and then to Mick.

© Carl Burkitt 2016

The businessmen seemed lovely.

They were chatting absolute nonsense about hedge funds and gateways and LEPs and mergers and takeovers and ‘wheat and chaff’.

But they seemed really lovely.

© Carl Burkitt 2016

The delayed tube drove straight through
The station without stopping,

Finally giving the hundreds of waiting
Commuters something to chat about.

© Carl Burkitt 2016

People always laughed
at the comedian.

That’s why he did what he did.

Again

And again

Until the laughter stopped.

© Carl Burkitt 2016

The celebrity took part in the
2016 Virgin Money London Marathon.
It was all terribly impressive.

© Carl Burkitt 2016

She wore a raspberry beret,
The kind you find in a second-hand store.
It was gross.
All sticky and gone off.

© Carl Burkitt 2016

My word, Jimmy was cool. He’d never had a cigarette in his life or success with the ladies or good dress sense or a very nice job or quick wit or a way with words or a close circle friends or ill feelings towards his mum or a tidy haircut or a messy haircut or a taste for beer or a love of street food or any ongoing hobbies or secret passions or general knowledge or anything like that but, my word, Jimmy was cool.

© Carl Burkitt 2016

I’ve got something. I don’t know what it is, but I’ve got it. It’s small but it feels like it could be powerful. You’ll hate it. I’m certain you’ll hate it, but I think I like it. I want to show you it. I don’t know what it is, but it’s definitely something.

© Carl Burkitt 2016