23/11/19 – Brook

Kelly Brook would often get asked
What are you up to these days, Kel?
She really enjoyed messing with people.
I’m a vampire! she might say. Or
I’m a pretty keen lumberjack! Or
I just can’t stop collaging! Or
I’ve been doing a lot of murders!
You know, harmless gags.
When, in fact, she was a presenter
On the Heart London drive show.
Interesting, eh?

© Carl Burkitt 2019

22/11/19 – Johansson

Scarlett Johansson
Became a stonemason.
She enjoyed sculpting the heads
Of people she’d worked with over the years.
You know, the likes of Bill Murray,
Jon Favreau, Rebecca Hall, Jennifer Aniston.
But her favourite to make was Mark Ruffalo
Because he had the same birthday as her!
Each year she would craft his handsome head
And smash it to a million pieces.

© Carl Burkitt 2019