50 legs. 50 presents. The presentipede spends the month of Crimbletide purchasing a whole host of fantastic gifts.

Once each limb is filled, it wanders passed the Christmas Creature orphanage and sets fire to the presents – laughing as it does so.

© Niklaus Von Stuffingball 1849

#ChristmasCreatures

(Illustration by Nicole Smeltzer)

A temperamental nightmare. This wobbly land beast possesses the power to knock seven shades of shit out of anything and the openness to reveal it misses you.

Wineoceroses are susceptible to prolonged headaches, red lips and caramel coloured urine. Outwardly the life and soul of the festive period, this Christmas Creature typically dies silently of regret.

© Niklaus Von Stuffingball 1849

#ChristmasCreatures

(Illustration by Nicole Smeltzer)

(Illustration by Steve Whittingham)

A generous little odd-toed ungulate. Effortlessly selfless, this gentle sweetheart is known to flog itself to death.

The gifthorse commonly dies alone as all other Christmas Creatures are instructed, from birth, to never look at it. Especially in the mouth.

Sadly, its mouth contains the cure for all known diseases.

© Niklaus Von Stuffingball 1849

#ChristmasCreatures

(Illustration by Nicole Smeltzer)

(Illustration by John Daglish)
 

One of the most beautiful sights on planet Earth. With its legs rooted in the ground, the Chimpantree makes gorgeous patterns in the sky with its stunningly long tinsel-arms.

The second it pops out of the ground in December, all of the other Christmas Creatures gather round to defecate under it. The Chimpantree loves it. Absolutely bloody loves it.

© Niklaus Von Stuffingball 1849

#ChristmasCreatures

(Illustration by Kat Sadler)

(Illustration by Caroline Brown)

(Illustration by John Daglish)

(Illustration by Nicole Smeltzer)

A prickly-flippered fucker. Takes everything to heart. This Christmas Creature is born on the back-foot and is impossible to get into an intelligent conversation with.

Unable to hug, this flightless twat shows love through passive aggression and intimidatingly expensive presents.

© Niklaus Von Stuffingball 1849

#ChristmasCreatures

(Illustration by Nicole Smeltzer)

(Illustration by John Daglish)

A rouge-schnozzed aquatic mammal. Feeds on the gullible and kind-hearted.

Too smart for its own good, this Christmas Creature isolates itself from everything in the ocean as its quick wit and holier-than-thou attitude translates as arrogant arsery.

Its unnecessary antlers help prey see it swimming a mile off, as well as making it look a total bellend.

© Niklaus Von Stuffingball 1849

#ChristmasCreatures

(Illustration by Sam Schafer)

(Illustration by John Daglish)

(Illustration by Nicole Smeltzer)