Ronnie O’Sullivan forgot his cue,
so blew the balls into the pockets.
He got a break of 89.
Not bad.
© Carl Burkitt 2016
Bad workmen
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Category Archives: Teeny tiny tales
Revenant
Leonardo DiCaprio finally won an Oscar. The year was 2213 and he looked terrible.
© Carl Burkitt 2016
January diet
Noddy Holder climbed back into his cave,
Nibbling on his royalties.
© Carl Burkitt 2016
Dedication
The paperboy forgot his papers so whispered the news through every letterbox. It took 4 weeks and he didn’t get laid once.
© Carl Burkitt 2016
Work ethic
The lazy man wrote a story. It had a beginning and a middle.
© Carl Burkitt 2016
Neighbour from hell
The block of flats was silent.
Josh farted.
64 lights flicked on and at least three texts were drafted.
© Carl Burkitt 2015
Not fussy
The tattoo artist tattooed a girlfriend on his arm.
‘Hmm,’ he thought. ‘I always imagined I’d end up with a blonde.’
© Carl Burkitt 2015
Truth behind the tale
“Nice outfit,” smiled Mr Twit.
“Fuck you,” said Mrs Twit, as they entered the divorce court.
© Carl Burkitt 2015
642 Challenge: “Nice outfit…”
It’s only a game, so
John Virgo poked his peas sporadically around his plate and sighed about the ‘good old days’.
© Carl Burkitt 2015
The saddest text message in the world
I love you 😦
© Carl Burkitt 2015
Carl tells tales 