I wonder if Number 2 is embarrassed
that the rest of us are laughing at them.
You are currently caller number 10.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

it just wants to stand on the picnic bench,
watch the tide fly gently in and out,
think about where it might live in a few months,
remember mountains, whales, sunsets of old,
listening out for lovers past and dead,
and simply scoff the boy’s parents’ chips in peace.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

Number 1 must be incredibly excited
sitting on their sofa or armchair
or lying on their bed or driving in their car.
What an effort they’ve put in so far.
They’ve probably just taken a swig of water
and let out a final cough, cracked their neck,
and lined up everything they need to say.
They’ve turned the radio down or off
and shut the window or door. Number 1
must be incredibly excited. What if they’re nervous?
Maybe they’re nervous. I bet Number 1 is nervous.
You are currently caller Number 11.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

but the bloke isn’t getting a look in.
He’s picking savoury pastry out of his teeth
with the corner of the bakery’s business card
watching his kids eat the biscuits like grapes.
He’s doing a wonderful job of pretending
he doesn’t care, talking to his wife about
the sky being rather blue and the sea
being rather blue and how the cloud over there
looks a bit like the head of the teacher
who called him a selfish little boy.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

Marilyn Monroe is screaming
at SpongeBob Squarepants.
She’s yet to call him Mr President,
because the sea does not have
an elected leader, but she’s called him
a Piece of shit and Absolutely useless.
SpongeBob doesn’t care, he has
a pizza in his hand and a permanent smile
stitched across his absorbent mask.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

I’d like to own a shop
that’s name doesn’t give away what it does.
People will walk past us on the street
and think maybe we’re a solicitors.
They will see our sign and wonder
if we can help them buy a house
or sell them tiles or mend their fences.
They will be surprised that we’re not
a bathroom showroom or a kitchen showroom
or a motorbike or car or tractor showroom.
They won’t be able to buy dead meat here.
We will not fix their plumbing or electrics.
We will sit on the high street
waiting for people with guts to say hello.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

I know people
less welcoming
than this public bin.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

Granddaughter and grandmother are playing
hide and seek. Grandmother is hiding
behind her daughter’s body. Granddaughter is
flummoxed. All she can see is her mother
standing tall, smiling mischievously.
Grandmother has vanished, gone, melted,
swallowed by the future, the strength and power
of a daughter she poured herself into.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

He’s telling his mate the news on speaker phone.
The English couple overhearing the conversation
do not understand the significance of the moment
but the man’s smiling teeth are dollar coins
and his eyes are an ancient mystery.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

and I wash urine from my penis
and I wash maple syrup from my fingers
and I wash suncreamscreen from my beard
and I wash bears from my eyes
and I wash killer whales from my eyes
and I wash bald eagles from my eyes
and I wash sea lions from my eyes
and I wash bad news from my muscles
with old company in new air.

© Carl Burkitt 2023