Cornwall. 20th June 2014. 20.00pm – Kick off.
Hazel, 94, is sat on the living room sofa with Barbara, 96, in a weirdly awkward silence for such close friends. Hazel turns to Barbara.
HAZEL: Did you know that Switzerland has four official languages-
HAZEL: None of which is used on their stamps?
HAZEL: They use Latin on their stamps.
BARBARA: I don’t really care.
Hazel looks around the room struggling to think of something to say.
HAZEL: Did you know Renée Zellweger is half Swiss?
BARBARA: Could’ve guessed, really.
HAZEL: Did you know the Swiss roll isn’t from Switzerland?
BARBARA: TAKE IT BACK!
HAZEL: It’s true. Apparently its origin is ‘Central Europe’ and the name is simply misleading.
Barbara does a quick Google search of ‘Swiss roll’.
Barbara passes out.
© Carl Burkitt 2014