Come gather fools, come gather I say,
For today is the day the lovers will play.
Some will be straight and some will be gay,
But all will be filthy on Valentine’s Day.
Legs will be splayed for every card that is made,
Whilst the bored are unleashed and deliciously depraved.
Tits will be licked and pricks will be pricked,
Whilst chocolate is spread on a whole host of dicks.
Pulses will race and genitals shall cry
As lovers pound each other and splurge in their eyes.
Young hearts so grateful for their thoughtful, cheap gift,
Sweet nothings they shall whisper as their spirits lift:
“Flick that and fist this and give those holes a big old kiss,
Then grab the whip and grab the chains
And you make sure I never walk again.
Go on my sweet – you horrid old
Fucker – squeeze this bit, bend me over,
And let me thank you, for that yummy Yakisoba.”
© Carl Burkitt 2014