The distant lapping of waves of a main road tide.
The starlit jangling of nightshift neighbour keys.
The broken circle of the moon.
Ageing dog yawns swallowed by puppy yelps.
The lining up of an army of dew.
Carl Burkitt 2024
Be strong, big man.
Make the most of your lie ins.
Learn the names of stars.
Change can be safe.
Remember to
…oh what’s the point,
you wouldn’t be reading a bloody poem.
Carl Burkitt 2024
The twins are playing badminton
in the leisure centre. They are just
as good (or as bad) as each other.
The one wearing black shorts is sweating,
the one wearing white shorts is sweating.
They are both laughing at the word ‘shuttlecock’.
Carl Burkitt 2024
They’re discussing
a PowerPoint presentation
about maximising output
in the workplace.
The train they’re sitting on
has no working toilets
and zero teabags.
Carl Burkitt 2024
He sits in the pub window
spotting potential friends flying by.
There’s the Long-Bearded Dawdler
wearing wrestling T-shirts
strolling like a man
with everywhere and nowhere to go.
There’s the Rapid Forehead
using its pointed radar
moving as quickly as the smile
travels across his face.
There’s the Cold Weather Shorts Wearer,
his feathered chest plumped,
rocking in time with a strut
fit for a turkey in summer.
There’s the Timid Southerner
tripping over his accent,
pecking his beak down streets
looking for somewhere to land.
He sits in the pub window
spotting potential friends flying by.
Carl Burkitt 2024
John don’t give an F tonight. He’s binning off
the broccoli quiche he had planned
and he’s decided to get curly fries
from across the road on the walk back
because he’s got some bread and butter
at home for a good chip barm.
His monosyllabic mates – Mick, John,
Paul and Ron – all agree it’s the right move
because the curly fries from across the road
are perfect for a good chip barm.
John agrees, itches his pork scratching nose,
and plans to get a double portion
just in case his wife is hungry too.
Carl Burkitt 2024
When he’s cleaning windows
he whistles The Great Escape theme
and has cheddar cheese in his teeth.
When he’s cleaning windows
he has a skull and no nonsense knees.
He has hula hoop hands and a laddered spine.
When he’s cleaning windows
his sponge is as soft as him,
his thoughts are warm suds.
Carl Burkitt 2024
He’s so handsome
his coffee isn’t going cold.
He’s so handsome
his laptop is letting him win at chess.
He’s so handsome
his table keeps whispering “thank you”
to his elbows for choosing it to rest on.
He’s so handsome
he doesn’t feel the need to look at me
when I ask him if he wouldn’t mind
moving his chair off my coat.
Carl Burkitt 2024
James and the Giant Peach taught me
to never go shopping with my wife
without our son. Yet here we are
on our way to ASDA after dropping him
at school. We cannot see a rhinoceros,
but a damp leaf just landed on our hand,
our intertwined fingers let the wind
blow it away when it felt the time was right.
Carl Burkitt 2024
They’re telling each other
about their favourite finance apps
saying things like ‘trade’ and ‘interest rates’.
The starch in their ironed shirts screams
when they high-five to the word ‘dividend’.
The landlord asks them to keep it down
and the one on the left calls him a ‘prick’
while the one of the right wipes cocaine
from his moustache.
Carl Burkitt 2024
Carl tells tales 