Richard Hammond
Found some new mates
And realised he just
Didn’t have to be that way anymore.

© Carl Burkitt 2018

Keith Richards
Spilt pilchards
All over his new shirt.
Like an embarrassed pup
He covered it up
By rolling in the dirt.

© Carl Burkitt 2018

Manny Pacquiao
Had a sore backuiao
Due to his far too heavy backpackuiao.

© Carl Burkitt 2018

The great Quentin Blake
Drew a snake.
It was brilliant.
It looked so good
It came to life
And ate loads of naughty people.
Pretty great drawing of a snake, eh?

© Carl Burkitt 2018

Adam Brody
Felt lonely.
He almost told someone
But there wasn’t anyone to tell.
Because he was alone.
Totally alone.

© Carl Burkitt 2018

Michael Owen
Was convinced he was still growing
So bought some really long trousers.
They looked ridiculous
And he kept tripping over,
But he stuck to his guns and bought more.
And more.

© Carl Burkitt 2018

Taylor Swift
Opened a gift.
It wasn’t for her,
Greedy git.

© Carl Burkitt 2018

Bill Nighy
Couldn’t lighy,
He always had a big crighy
Whenever he had to say goodbighy
To his best mate, Brighy.

© Carl Burkitt 2018

Ben Shephard
Put a tea towel on his head,
Shoved some myrrh in his pocket
And went running into the winter night.

© Carl Burkitt 2018

Kenneth Branagh
Lost his spanner
So decided to use a hammer.
It didn’t work, obviously,
It was definitely a job for a spanner.

© Carl Burkitt 2018