Tinchy Stryder
Had a massive gait.
© Carl Burkitt 2019
14/9/19 – Stryder
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Category Archives: Celebrity Birthdays
13/9/19 – McCartney
Stella McCartney
Had a dart in her knee.
It was bloody painful
And, in truth,
A little bit funny.
© Carl Burkitt 2019
12/9/19 – Zimmer
Hans Zimmer
Was a good skimmer
Of stones.
It wasn’t obvious
To look at him,
But when you think about it
His hands were pretty ace
At the piano and stuff.
So it makes sense.
© Carl Burkitt 2019
11/9/19 – Vegas
Johnny Vegas
Was feeling OUTRAGEOUS,
So spent the day
Whispering.
© Carl Burkitt 2019
10/9/19 – Ritchie
Guy Ritchie
Got all bitchy
When he skin was hot,
Dry and itchy.
(Especially his arsehole.)
© Carl Burkitt 2019
9/9/19 – Grant
Hugh Grant
Did something
Awfully charming,
One would imagine.
© Carl Burkitt 2019
8/9/19 – Arquette
David Arquette
Got a poisonous pet snake.
He let it sliver and quiver
Over the nape of this neck
Against all the advice
From his terrified vet.
© Carl Burkitt 2019
7/9/19 – Elizabeth
Shannon Elizabeth,
The actor who played Nadia
In the American Pie franchise,
Preferred a flan.
© Carl Burkitt 2019
6/9/19 – Henman
Tim Henman
Would whisper
“Come on Tim”
To help himself
Get to sleep
At night.
© Carl Burkitt 2019
5/9/19 – Herzog
Werner Herzog
Made a film about a warthog.
It was ambitious, affecting,
Tear-jerking, illuminating,
And groundbreaking.
A film about a warthog!
Clever, clever Werner.
© Carl Burkitt 2019
Carl tells tales 