He sits in the pub window
spotting potential friends flying by.
There’s the Long-Bearded Dawdler
wearing wrestling T-shirts
strolling like a man
with everywhere and nowhere to go.
There’s the Rapid Forehead
using its pointed radar
moving as quickly as the smile
travels across his face.
There’s the Cold Weather Shorts Wearer,
his feathered chest plumped,
rocking in time with a strut
fit for a turkey in summer.
There’s the Timid Southerner
tripping over his accent,
pecking his beak down streets
looking for somewhere to land.
He sits in the pub window
spotting potential friends flying by.

Carl Burkitt 2024

John don’t give an F tonight. He’s binning off
the broccoli quiche he had planned
and he’s decided to get curly fries
from across the road on the walk back
because he’s got some bread and butter
at home for a good chip barm.
His monosyllabic mates – Mick, John,
Paul and Ron – all agree it’s the right move
because the curly fries from across the road
are perfect for a good chip barm.
John agrees, itches his pork scratching nose,
and plans to get a double portion
just in case his wife is hungry too.

Carl Burkitt 2024

When he’s cleaning windows
he whistles The Great Escape theme
and has cheddar cheese in his teeth.
When he’s cleaning windows
he has a skull and no nonsense knees.
He has hula hoop hands and a laddered spine.
When he’s cleaning windows
his sponge is as soft as him,
his thoughts are warm suds.

Carl Burkitt 2024

He’s so handsome
his coffee isn’t going cold.
He’s so handsome
his laptop is letting him win at chess.
He’s so handsome
his table keeps whispering “thank you”
to his elbows for choosing it to rest on.
He’s so handsome
he doesn’t feel the need to look at me
when I ask him if he wouldn’t mind
moving his chair off my coat.

Carl Burkitt 2024

James and the Giant Peach taught me
to never go shopping with my wife
without our son. Yet here we are
on our way to ASDA after dropping him
at school. We cannot see a rhinoceros,
but a damp leaf just landed on our hand,
our intertwined fingers let the wind
blow it away when it felt the time was right.

Carl Burkitt 2024

They’re telling each other
about their favourite finance apps
saying things like ‘trade’ and ‘interest rates’.
The starch in their ironed shirts screams
when they high-five to the word ‘dividend’.
The landlord asks them to keep it down
and the one on the left calls him a ‘prick’
while the one of the right wipes cocaine
from his moustache.

Carl Burkitt 2024

When Erling Haaland wakes
he is as alive as the sun.
His feet move too fast for slippers
across his bedroom floor,
past the wooden rescue centre,
over the basket of Hot Wheels
on the living room play mat
and into the morning kitchen.
Multicoloured cereals want to be eaten by him.
Milk jumps out of cartons.
Bowls fight for the right
to have spoons dipped in them.
The wind blows kisses through the windows.
His skin grows, lets the muscles below
get stronger than they were yesterday.

Carl Burkitt 2024

Nikki Pebbles wants me to dig in.
She reckons the pain in my quads is temporary
and I need to think about tomorrow’s grit.
The sweat sliding into my eyes stings
as much as my backside aches
to the stabs of my static bike’s saddle.
Nikki Pebbles’ red ponytail is barely even moving
on the screen attached to my handle bars;
her calves are rocks built to trample
on any thought in my mind to press the off button.
Nikki Pebbles wants me to dig in, again.
She tells me to spend the next minute
pretending to run away from danger
or issues I’ve never addressed
with loved ones or colleagues
or any thought in my mind to press the off button.
Nikki Pebbles wants me to dig in.

Carl Burkitt 2024

the poet sits at the desk
like
like potato boiling eggs
like a fish sewing onions
like an inside out door
like a disused chocolate washing machine
like
like a peacock wrapped in mittens
like a plumber on a lilo
like like
like a banker robber on a Sunday
like a ukulele on toast
like

Carl Burkitt 2024

Erling Haaland ordered a Buzz Lightyear toy
with a voucher he got for his birthday.
He spent the day at training thinking
about pressing the button to make it say,
“Too infinity, and beyond!”
and introducing it to the Woody
that already lived in his flat.
Imagining opening up the parcel
and flying Buzz around his bedroom
made him forget about pleasing strangers,
hitting the post at the weekend,
and the fact his bones were older than yesterday.

Carl Burkitt 2024