I could go on all day about the lack of manners in Peppa Pig

but all of the children’s names are alliterative –
Zoe Zebra, Candy Cat, Pedro Pony,
Danny Dog, Suzy Sheep, Freddy Fox,
Rebecca Rabbit (her little brother Richard),
Kylie Kangeroo, Gerald Giraffe,
Molly Mole, Mandy Mouse, Wendy Wolf,
Emily Elephant (her little brother Edmund),
Belinda Bear, Delphine Donkey – all except
for Peppa’s little brother George.
He’s never referred to as George Pig. Just George.
He gets laughed at for saying words wrong,
being rubbish at hide and seek, wanting a balloon
when everyone else wants an ice cream.
The universe is different for George. He gets told
dinosaurs don’t grow on trees, silly, but digs
a hole and plants a fucking T-Rex anyway.

© Carl Burkitt 2023

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