Fundraising = Thumbraising.
You dun a fing. A real good fing. So here’s some quids. Sum real good quids.
Ooh, you’re ‘ard.
“What have you done today, to make you feeeel proud?”…raised dollar, THAT’S WHAT!
What has two thumbs and upmost respect for what you’re doing?! Someone. Somewhere. Probably.
Who are you?
Will you marry me?
“You (fund)raise me up, so I can stand on mountains. You (fund)raise me up to walk on stormy seas!”
You won’t BELIEVE what I Googled to end up on this page. Doesn’t bother me though, it’ll still do the job…
I’m happy to give you this money, but if you don’t complete your challenge: I will find you, and I will kill you.
My name’s Chris. My name’s Chris. My name’s Chris. My name’s Chris. My name’s Chris. My name’s Chris. My name’s Chris. My name’s Chris.
Are you doing this to prove you’re better than me?
I don’t think I’ve ever told you how proud I am of you. And I plan to keep it that way.
Fundraise. Fundphrase. Fundplays. Fundgraze. Fundmaze. Fundpraise. Fundhaze. Fundlaze. Fundsleighs. Fundbraise. Fundneighs. Fundpays.
You don’t want to know how I got this money. But if anyone asks, you don’t know me. GOOD LUCK!
Remind me, the next time I see you, to give you back that thing you left at my place. You know. THAT thing.
OMG U R GR8 BBZ I LUV U MEGA LUV N LOLS N LUV N U R GNA SMSH IT M8 XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX
I used to be a DJ.
Money rhymes with Mummy. I love money. I love my Mummy. (And I love your Mummy)
© Carl Burkitt 2017
Brief by Chris Hough: “I would like 140 characters on what to write in donation page comments. I always end up writing the same thing.”
This piece was written as a part of a fundraising project for Rethink Mental Illness, where I’m inviting people to set me any writing brief in exchange for donations.