Valentine’s people

Verity felt great.
She loved the feel of her skin,
so instead of stepping out of the house
she spent the night in.
(So to speak.)


Andy bought plants
for everyone in his street
and decided to deliver them door-to-door.

Getting the cactus through
Cameron’s letterbox was tough,
but the bare-footed screams
were worth the wait.


Lee licked his lollipop and handed it to Leanne.
Leanne shoved it deep into her left eye
before the couple laughed
their way to Specsavers.


Eve ate Darren’s chips.
Darren ate Eve’s wafer.
Just like any other night.


Nick pressed play on his laptop
and left the door ajar.


Tony posted 75 selfies.
He liked number 36 the best.
It captured his worst side perfectly.


Iris eyed up Irene.
Irene returned the favour.

Iris offered Irene an ice cream.
Irene slipped her gnashers out and gobbled it whole.

Iris brushed Irene’s hair.
Irene purred.

Iris lay down.
Irene joined her.

Iris woke up.
Tears filled her eyes.


Nora received a homemade, heart-shaped card.
The intricate details of the atria and ventricles
made her vomit absolutely everywhere.


Eric was finally granted a date.
45 years.
45 years of hard graft it took.
So it’s safe to say
his sudden death
was a right pain in the arse.


Sue sued her dating agency
on the grounds “kinky, up for a laugh, male”
was far too related to her.

© Carl Burkitt 2017

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