Erling Haaland is wearing white boots
with blue and green Velcro straps.
Whenever he puts his foot on the ground,
three mini lights on the side of them flash brightly.
His top teeth are chewing his bottom lip
and he’s standing in the community hall
with intent. When the coach says run
to a red cone, he sprints to a red cone.
When the coach says stand on one leg
and talk like a pirate, he roars ARRR
loud enough to make the tide go out.
He breaks quickly to rehydrate from a bottle
with illustrated tractors and lorries on it,
then rejoins the queue to smash penalties
into an empty net by the toilet door.
The session ends and Erling Haaland sits
cross-legged on the floorboards. He doesn’t win
the golden sticker today, but he gets a blue one
and asks the coach if I can have one too.

Carl Burkitt 2024