I’m sorry, Justin Timberlake, but you are not cool. You always look awkward. I wouldn’t usually say such a horrible thing about someone, but you just don’t look comfortable. It’s like you’re wearing someone else’s skin and every hip shake is a failed attempt to break free. Your eyes look dead. And I bet you have a fuller smile somewhere. I’m sorry. You are handsome. In a, sort of, I’m told to think you’re handsome kind of way. I’d kiss you, but I don’t think you’d like it. And neither would I. But I’d definitely kiss you. That’s the kind of world we live in now. Isn’t it?

© Carl Burkitt 2017